3 Ways to Love Yourself through the Holidays

It can’t be true! OMG, it’s happened again! The holiday season is here and it’s baring down on you already. You are wondering how to pay your monthly bills and at the same time shop for gifts for your beloved family and friends. You are feeling the pinch more than ever praying for a way to make it happen and see no relief or alternatives are in sight.

Believe it or not, you have choices. Especially during the holidays, any sort of fulfillment or joy will slip through your fingers if you don’t do something different. Before you know it, you will be thinking about what kind of New Years resolutions you should make so life can be different or better.

Last year I laid out a plan to make it through the season and set myself up for success in the New Year. As the holidays went into full swing, I asked myself what I wanted to create in my life for my New Year. I began with the festivities at hand. Being present to making choices about pending party invites, shopping for family and friends, and then seeing I had my own needs that I wanted met and continuously put on the side. I saw this habit repeat itself year after year and finally decided to take action as this was not the way I wanted to live, I didn’t feel happy and I finally saw what “I” had created and was ready for change. Because I was aware of this mess I was in, willing to make a change, consciously putting it out in the universe then taking action, abundance began to flow. 

If you haven’t figured why your life is living out a certain way, here is the answer.  Thoughts held in mind, produce after their kind.  Another way of saying this is, thoughts become things, or to think is to create.  Many great people have shared a similar notion over time.  The question is, have you noticed this works the same for you? 

I changed when I noticed I was doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. The feeling was euphoric. I got a nudge, maybe from God or Spirit that said I didn’t have to do it, whatever “it” was, like everyone one else anymore.  I could say “no” to a party, “no” to the gift exchange, “no” to anything I wanted. Not easy and oh so necessary to live life in an abundant way for me.  I saw that when I was at peace, so was the world around me.  So let me share these holiday tips for loving yourself through the season.

  1. NO MEANS YES. Just say “no”. I know it sounds like the drug campaign from long ago and it works.  It worked then, just as it works now. Here is an example of how you can reply.  “Thank you for the invitation. I am already committed.” Most will not ask what you are committed to. If someone does ask, you reply, “myself.” “I am taking time to myself on that date and while I’d love to be present for your event, this is how I manage my self-care.”  It’s very hard to argue this point. This is not a way to get out of something either. This is for you to create time for yourself, so use it wisely. Great abundance can be found in honoring other people’s “no” too. 
  2. BE PRESENT. When you are spending time with family or friends, adjust your body language.  Really notice how you are being with them. Are you listening and completely present? Can you free yourself from your handheld device for a moment for quality interaction? Are you listening or is it all about you? By being present you are giving the other person the gift of you and filling up your own cup at the same time. It’s called givers gain. Often times craving out time for a simple cup of coffee or giving a card with reflective personal message is all someone ever really rejoices in and remembers for that matter. It’s not the gifts give but the presence of you that is memorable.
  3. RESOLUTION FREE. Set up your solutions for the coming year.  I like to call them ‘Soulutions.’ Create a couple things that are actually doable and will lift your Spirit, move you forward and are important to you.  Not urgent but important. Set urgent things aside because usually they are not important. Do the important, long lasting actions first. ‘Soulutions’ are ideas that change old patterns, excite you and you look forward to participating in everyday. Let your Spirit be your guide. Men usually call it gut, women call it intuition, I like to call it Spirit. 

“Just Do It”, the 1988 slogan from Nike changed the product forever. Nike was also the goddess of strength, speed and victory.  These are all words with action involved.  If you don’t act or do something, you will have exactly what you have now.  The same thing.  So why not?  You will find that these three activities will enliven your life beyond measure. You will make it through the holidays with celebration in a way that is unexpected and delightful. Take these on and see what happens.  Just do it.  You are worth it!

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